Waving the White Flag

[aearwen2]

Ok. I give up.

Not only has the Muse that was helping me do my NaNo gone into hiding, but her place has been taken over by two substitutes: my fanfic Muse, who dumped a not quite 5k-word sequel to Ghost on me over the last two days; and my music Muse, who is now demanding AT THE TOP OF HER VOICE that I go back to putting in the 8.5 to 10 hours a week (or more) to try to get myself back up to my former skill level.

The manufacturers of aceteminophen and aspirin will enjoy a small boost in sales as a result of the latter, as I'm now working arthritic shoulders and damaged muscles in arms a heckuva lot more in the process of practicing. But I actually enjoyed my practice today (of course, it doesn't hurt to have access to a nice 6-foot Steinway grand to practice ON...)

I will *try* to keep working on the original novel, but without the pressure NaNo puts on one. I still have the start of the novel I worked on last year. Wonderful, having these beginnings on the hard drive, and tinkering with them from time to time.

The thing is, I've done 50k words/month before. I used to churn out that much and more when writing for my old fandom. I also burned out rather abruptly too. I truly have no intent to do anything to myself that will burn out my interest in writing per se.

But I'm jazzed about playing the piano with a little more discipline again. Music really is my first love – and the piano was the first instrument I learned (started it at age 4.) I'm hoping the workout of my arms will help the arthritis, and that working the muscles that I *think* I tore years ago will help them heal too. I've given up my violin and guitar - by Eru, I'll be blasted if I'm gonna give up my piano!!

Comments

[peredhellover.livejournal.com]

I, for one, am not too upset to hear that you’re resigning for more meaningful and quality pursuits. Personally, I think you're far too sensible a woman to be participating in that, for lack of a better word (oh, I have lots of other words, but for the sake of discretion, I choose not to use them)--annoying--entity that is NaNoWriMo. ;)

peredhil lover

[rhapsody11.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I don't feel the nano pressure at all, but my reasons for participating are different. Just do what feels right for you, and if creating beautiful music is it... :c) Let those fingers fly!

Waving the white flag...

[(Anonymous)]

Dear Aearwen,

Don't feel that you are defeated - if anything, I feel that when one recognizes that one is fighting a losing battle, and knows when to stop, one imerges stronger and more of a winner for it. At least, that is how I felt at one time in my life....

I hope you get to enjoy your piano too! I too play played guitar and violin and stopped when college and life got in the way ( and life still gets in the way...ugh). It's actually been so long since I played that I don't recall where the notes are played on the fretboards or what they look like on sheet music. How bad/sad is that? Someday I will get back to them...some day soon.

And a sequel to Ghost?? Wow wonders what that intails...Dying to know here...

Hugs and Love,
Vanime

[galantha-nivala.livejournal.com]

Nanowrimo doesn't work for a lot of people. The pressure to produce can be really overwhelming. It seems to have inspired you to other creative endeavors, though and that's great.

It's funny how different things can inspire people's muses. I find nano really, really useful. My internal editor almost always beats a story to death before I get past the beginning, but in November I give myself permission to ignore the IE. I'm now at 35K of a story that has been little more than scattered notes for the past five years.

It isn't for everyone, but I find it incredibly helpful.